{"id":357,"date":"2025-04-02T07:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-04-02T07:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/moneywithkatie.com\/pineapple-suite-state-of-mind\/"},"modified":"2025-09-05T00:22:52","modified_gmt":"2025-09-05T00:22:52","slug":"pineapple-suite-state-of-mind","status":"publish","type":"essays","link":"https:\/\/moneywithkatie.com\/essays\/pineapple-suite-state-of-mind\/","title":{"rendered":"Pineapple Suite State of Mind"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"sqs-html-content\" data-sqsp-text-block-content=\"\">\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"><em>This essay contains copious White Lotus season 3 spoilers. If you\u2019re not caught up, please stop whatever else you\u2019re doing and go spend the next eight hours in front of your TV, which is the only screen we\u2019re celebrating today.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<hr \/>\n<div class=\"sqs-html-content\" data-sqsp-text-block-content=\"\">\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">Timothy Ratliff is screwed.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">While on vacation at a fictional resort in Thailand called the White Lotus (filmed at the real Four Seasons Koh Samui, where the Ratliffs\u2019 \u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/www.fourseasons.com\/kohsamui\/accommodations\/private_residences\/three_bedroom_residence_villa_with_pool\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Three Bedroom Residence Villa with Pool<\/span><\/a>\u201d will set you back an astonishing $10,349 per night), our friend Tim finds out the FBI is ransacking his office in connection to his involvement with a money laundering operation. (\u201cAnd I only made $10 million out of your stupid fucking scheme? Fuck!\u201d he shouts at his co-conspirator from 11 timezones away.) This is one of the subplots of the third season of HBO\u2019s <em>White Lotus<\/em>, a show which is mostly about power dynamics and rich people behaving badly in beautiful places, a \u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/www.vox.com\/culture\/22622686\/white-lotus-finale-departures-recap-review-hbo\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">class satire<\/span><\/a>\u201d about \u201csocial climbing\u201d and the necks that typically get stepped on in pursuit of ascension.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/moneywithkatie.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/TimRatliffonPhone.webp\" alt=\" While I\u2019ve never tried my hand at money laundering (and I\u2019d never deign to put the word \u201conly\u201d ahead of \u201c$10 million\u201d), there was something uncomfortably familiar about Tim\u2019s preoccupied state on vacation. Every time he deflected inquiries from his family about why he seemed so stressed and absent, stalking off with his sweaty palm wrapped around his phone, I winced with recognition. It had echoes (minus the federal investigation) of the half-dozen or so times I\u2019d taken a whole week off work, only to catch a glimpse of a push notification that violently grounded my mental faculties in the deadlines, open requests, or\u2014worst of all\u2014negative feedback inherent to a job conducted in a digital office that can reach you wherever there\u2019s cell service. This feeling intensified in lockstep with my earnings over the years; more than a day or two of time away felt not just risky, but  wrong , when availability was technically possible and the obligations of real life continuously accrued behind a red badge app icon within arm\u2019s reach.  In my experience, even if an intrusion didn\u2019t require immediate tending, it still left a psychic residue that persisted for hours. My body may have been sitting in a beach chair facing the ocean, but my mind was buzzing around my inbox, crafting responses to disgruntled messages and playing calendar Jenga with time-sensitive appointments that had managed to pierce the veil of my autoresponder from halfway across the world. There I\u2019d be, on some trip that was meticulously planned, saved for, and in some cases, required days of travel, only to find myself itching to sneak away to good WiFi so I could do the very thing from which I was supposedly taking a break.\u00a0  This can have the unfortunate effect of making one paradoxically agitated with the break itself. There\u2019s perhaps nobody to whom Tim vents more flashes of frustration than the hotel employee who keeps suggesting he surrender his phone to her tech gulag, a locked tote bag\u2014it\u2019s clear she\u2019s seen his type before.\u00a0  After he begins availing himself of his wife Victoria\u2019s generously supplied Lorazepam stash to cope with the debilitating panic of his imminent arrest, he becomes even more withdrawn and vacant. The fact that not a single family member seems to clock this shift for days (or draw the obvious conclusion from her missing pills and his inability to open his mouth long enough to form multisyllabic sentences) is revealing in its own way. A totally distracted breadwinner on what is surely a six-figure family vacation is more or less standard for this family. In a conversation between Tim and his oldest son (and hopeful prot\u00e9g\u00e9) Saxon about why Saxon, too, cannot bear to sacrifice his laptop to the tech bag, the nature of these characters\u2019 pursuit of money and success is revealed in sharper contrast. Saxon, who always looks like he just walked off the pages of a 2012 Vineyard Vines catalog, declares with  a timing and tone impossible  to convey in plain text, \u201cI know I tell you this all the time, dad, but\u2026I  love  working.\u201d Despite his proximity to excessive wealth and the unreal experiences it can buy, Saxon is still early in his career and \u201cunimportant\u201d in the way he perceives his father to be. To him, being constantly connected is both a path to and symbol of success and legitimacy. (An especially funny juxtaposition given who, exactly, keeps trying to contact Tim, now that we know where  his  insatiable drive for power landed him.)\u00a0  Saxon\u2019s attitude, while a little sad, is understandable\u2014and can even be practically useful. Even jobs that offer paid time off, a privilege in the US where one in four workers have none, often don\u2019t reduce expectations of output accordingly. You may be lucky enough to score three weeks of vacation  time  per year, but there\u2019s still 52 weeks\u2019 worth of work expected. In response to this reality,  46% of Americans  who are offered paid vacation time don\u2019t use it all, with half of them citing the fear of \u201cfalling behind at work.\u201d In that sense, the ability to luxuriate fully and fearlessly in unstructured time away is an elusive freedom; one that money struggles to buy.  In March, we ended up mushing two trips back to back: the first a family affair that lined up with our nieces\u2019 spring break, the second to a place easily accessible from the West coast\u2014Hawai\u2019i\u2014before we migrate closer to the center of the country again. I had never taken off two weeks in a row before, so I prepared by spending the month leading up to our indulgent travel binge working much longer hours than usual. As our departure date crept closer, I became fixated on how I was using my time: managing it, optimizing it, preparing myself to enjoy it. Because of how much work (and money) was going into making these adventures possible, the break became freighted with the expectation that I\u2019d make the most of my time away; chiefly, by staying offline.\u00a0  Time\u2014or a lack thereof\u2014is intimately connected to all manner of socioeconomic issues we don\u2019t traditionally think of as bound by the strictures of the clock. The \u201cMake America Healthy Again\u201d preoccupation with food dyes and genetically modified organisms, for example,  often misses  that it is not the presence of cheap microwaveable meals, but the absence of time to prepare fresh food three times daily, that leaves many people eating things that aren\u2019t as nutritious as they\u2019d probably prefer. Another example comes in the form of the seemingly intractable gender wage gap, often attributed to a lopsided distribution of unpaid domestic labor, which data from other countries suggests  has been softened and shrunk  by the introduction of things like four-day work weeks or shortened working hours\u2014allowing  all  workers more time to tend to their homes and the people in them.\u00a0  When we welcomed a bounty of technologically enabled access into our lives, I don\u2019t think many of us realized it meant not just access for us, but to us. (My mom was a rare holdout, refusing a smartphone until the 2020s: \u201cI don\u2019t want to be that easy to reach,\u201d she\u2019d often say.) The sense of having too little time can be another way of expressing the feeling of having too much of something else. For me, that \u201csomething else\u201d often feels like a buzzing static of fragmented half-thoughts introduced by the portal of obligations and breaking news alerts most of us carry around all day, digital serfs paying cloud rent to the cyber kingdoms of tech billionaires in the currencies that matter most online: our time, our attention, our peace. A cottage industry\u2014from the entire back catalog of  writers like Cal Newport  to  apps like the appropriately named Freedom  to wellness resorts that make you lock your phone in a sack\u2014has developed to offer solutions for the human inability to resist this frenzied alienation and regain a sense of presence that\u2019s been hijacked.  One morning while hiking on our trip, I caught wind that an error in some recently published material had started a skirmish that required me to remedy the mistake before it escalated further. I may have been \u201coffline,\u201d but my digital body double (and everything she\u2019s ever said) was still accessible in another realm 24 hours per day. Cheeks suddenly warm and pulse thudding in my ears from the sense of overexposure (my standard physiological response to being publicly accused of stupidity, unfortunately), I rushed back to the car to focus on my tiny screen in silence. I thought of Tim, sneaking away from dinner to check his notifications in the bushes. \" \/><\/p>\n<p>While I\u2019ve never tried my hand at money laundering (and I\u2019d never deign to put the word \u201conly\u201d ahead of \u201c$10 million\u201d), there was something uncomfortably familiar about Tim\u2019s preoccupied state on vacation. Every time he deflected inquiries from his family about why he seemed so stressed and absent, stalking off with his sweaty palm wrapped around his phone, I winced with recognition. It had echoes (minus the federal investigation) of the half-dozen or so times I\u2019d taken a whole week off work, only to catch a glimpse of a push notification that violently grounded my mental faculties in the deadlines, open requests, or\u2014worst of all\u2014negative feedback inherent to a job conducted in a digital office that can reach you wherever there\u2019s cell service. This feeling intensified in lockstep with my earnings over the years; more than a day or two of time away felt not just risky, but wrong , when availability was technically possible and the obligations of real life continuously accrued behind a red badge app icon within arm\u2019s reach.<\/p>\n<p>In my experience, even if an intrusion didn\u2019t require immediate tending, it still left a psychic residue that persisted for hours. My body may have been sitting in a beach chair facing the ocean, but my mind was buzzing around my inbox, crafting responses to disgruntled messages and playing calendar Jenga with time-sensitive appointments that had managed to pierce the veil of my autoresponder from halfway across the world. There I\u2019d be, on some trip that was meticulously planned, saved for, and in some cases, required days of travel, only to find myself itching to sneak away to good WiFi so I could do the very thing from which I was supposedly taking a break.<\/p>\n<p>This can have the unfortunate effect of making one paradoxically agitated with the break itself. There\u2019s perhaps nobody to whom Tim vents more flashes of frustration than the hotel employee who keeps suggesting he surrender his phone to her tech gulag, a locked tote bag\u2014it\u2019s clear she\u2019s seen his type before.<\/p>\n<p>After he begins availing himself of his wife Victoria\u2019s generously supplied Lorazepam stash to cope with the debilitating panic of his imminent arrest, he becomes even more withdrawn and vacant. The fact that not a single family member seems to clock this shift for days (or draw the obvious conclusion from her missing pills and his inability to open his mouth long enough to form multisyllabic sentences) is revealing in its own way. A totally distracted breadwinner on what is surely a six-figure family vacation is more or less standard for this family. In a conversation between Tim and his oldest son (and hopeful prot\u00e9g\u00e9) Saxon about why Saxon, too, cannot bear to sacrifice his laptop to the tech bag, the nature of these characters\u2019 pursuit of money and success is revealed in sharper contrast. Saxon, who always looks like he just walked off the pages of a 2012 Vineyard Vines catalog, declares with a timing and tone impossible to convey in plain text, \u201cI know I tell you this all the time, dad, but\u2026I love working.\u201d Despite his proximity to excessive wealth and the unreal experiences it can buy, Saxon is still early in his career and \u201cunimportant\u201d in the way he perceives his father to be. To him, being constantly connected is both a path to and symbol of success and legitimacy. (An especially funny juxtaposition given who, exactly, keeps trying to contact Tim, now that we know where his insatiable drive for power landed him.)<\/p>\n<p>Saxon\u2019s attitude, while a little sad, is understandable\u2014and can even be practically useful. Even jobs that offer paid time off, a privilege in the US where one in four workers have none, often don\u2019t reduce expectations of output accordingly. You may be lucky enough to score three weeks of vacation time per year, but there\u2019s still 52 weeks\u2019 worth of work expected. In response to this reality, 46% of Americans who are offered paid vacation time don\u2019t use it all, with half of them citing the fear of \u201cfalling behind at work.\u201d In that sense, the ability to luxuriate fully and fearlessly in unstructured time away is an elusive freedom; one that money struggles to buy.<\/p>\n<p>In March, we ended up mushing two trips back to back: the first a family affair that lined up with our nieces\u2019 spring break, the second to a place easily accessible from the West coast\u2014Hawai\u2019i\u2014before we migrate closer to the center of the country again. I had never taken off two weeks in a row before, so I prepared by spending the month leading up to our indulgent travel binge working much longer hours than usual. As our departure date crept closer, I became fixated on how I was using my time: managing it, optimizing it, preparing myself to enjoy it. Because of how much work (and money) was going into making these adventures possible, the break became freighted with the expectation that I\u2019d make the most of my time away; chiefly, by staying offline.<\/p>\n<p>Time\u2014or a lack thereof\u2014is intimately connected to all manner of socioeconomic issues we don\u2019t traditionally think of as bound by the strictures of the clock. The \u201cMake America Healthy Again\u201d preoccupation with food dyes and genetically modified organisms, for example, often misses that it is not the presence of cheap microwaveable meals, but the absence of time to prepare fresh food three times daily, that leaves many people eating things that aren\u2019t as nutritious as they\u2019d probably prefer. Another example comes in the form of the seemingly intractable gender wage gap, often attributed to a lopsided distribution of unpaid domestic labor, which data from other countries suggests has been softened and shrunk by the introduction of things like four-day work weeks or shortened working hours\u2014allowing all workers more time to tend to their homes and the people in them.<\/p>\n<p>When we welcomed a bounty of technologically enabled access into our lives, I don\u2019t think many of us realized it meant not just access for us, but to us. (My mom was a rare holdout, refusing a smartphone until the 2020s: \u201cI don\u2019t want to be that easy to reach,\u201d she\u2019d often say.) The sense of having too little time can be another way of expressing the feeling of having too much of something else. For me, that \u201csomething else\u201d often feels like a buzzing static of fragmented half-thoughts introduced by the portal of obligations and breaking news alerts most of us carry around all day, digital serfs paying cloud rent to the cyber kingdoms of tech billionaires in the currencies that matter most online: our time, our attention, our peace. A cottage industry\u2014from the entire back catalog of writers like Cal Newport to apps like the appropriately named Freedom to wellness resorts that make you lock your phone in a sack\u2014has developed to offer solutions for the human inability to resist this frenzied alienation and regain a sense of presence that\u2019s been hijacked.<\/p>\n<p>One morning while hiking on our trip, I caught wind that an error in some recently published material had started a skirmish that required me to remedy the mistake before it escalated further. I may have been \u201coffline,\u201d but my digital body double (and everything she\u2019s ever said) was still accessible in another realm 24 hours per day. Cheeks suddenly warm and pulse thudding in my ears from the sense of overexposure (my standard physiological response to being publicly accused of stupidity, unfortunately), I rushed back to the car to focus on my tiny screen in silence. I thought of Tim, sneaking away from dinner to check his notifications in the bushes.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/moneywithkatie.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/IMG_7462-scaled.webp\" alt=\"  An island kitty lounging on a surfboard for a midday snooze, having never known the horrors of Microsoft Teams.  \" \/><\/p>\n<div class=\"sqs-html-content\" data-sqsp-text-block-content=\"\">\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">For much of our two-week travel bender, my sense of time warped under the influence of changing time zones, producing moments of genuine pleasure. While I had hoped for the purity of an unpunctured pause, I often haggled with recurrent flares of anxiety that everything I had left thousands of miles behind was still playing without me; that when I returned, I\u2019d be on fast-forward until synced up again. (In the words of the paid time off study: \u201cFear of falling behind.\u201d) But it\u2019s also undeniable that several days of fewer than 30 minutes total screen time produced a startling mental clarity (and the sheepish embarrassment of embodying a clich\u00e9): Millennial Woman Finally Turns Off Phone and Knows Peace for First Time.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">For our last meal before heading to the airport, we decided to visit the Four Seasons Wailea (where <a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=TGLq7_MonZ4&amp;ab_channel=HBO\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">the first season<\/span><\/a> of <em>White Lotus<\/em> was filmed). The poolside breakfast restaurant was bustling with people who could\u2019ve easily been cast as extras: women with Connie Britton-blond blowouts, wrinkle-free foreheads, a rainbow of Herm\u00e8s sandals on teen boys and older women alike, and silky swim coverups draped leisurely over taut pilates bodies. Men whose behavior seemed calibrated to project an air of harried importance took calls at breakfast while their families dined and chatted around them; I nearly broadsided one rushing to meet his seated wife and children after bellowing to the host he had been working that morning and needed something quick before he returned.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">It was a caricature of the caricature portrayed in Mike White\u2019s world, rendering the presentation of families like the Ratliffs something closer to a docuseries than a drama. Even here, at a beautiful beach resort surrounded by ocean on all sides for thousands of miles where a week-long stay costs the equivalent of six months median rent at a minimum, many still seemed clocked in by choice. It is a strange affluence of Faustian proportions in which one can afford a $2,000 nightly room rate, but cannot afford to eat breakfast without joining a conference call. I wonder what John Maynard Keynes, famed predictor of the late twentieth century 15-hour work week, would say. A life that permits you the most rarefied luxury of time freedom in theory but not in practice presents interesting questions about what \u201cluxury\u201d really means, though sitting at the Four Seasons Wailea, I felt pretty sure it wasn\u2019t sitting by a pool responding to emails.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">There\u2019s a glut of research attempting to study the screen time habits of children and teenagers, which is sometimes found to be higher in low-income households\u2014but there\u2019s surprisingly little in the way of studies attempting to parse how adults\u2019 relationships with the worlds in their devices are impacted by characteristics like income or wealth. The digital attention economy is, in many ways, an equal opportunity spiritual vampire, a rare feature of modern life that does not improve with socioeconomic standing. Extreme wealth can buy a room at the Four Seasons, but it can\u2019t buy a less addictive iPhone.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/moneywithkatie.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/Season1.webp\" alt=\"  Just status anxiety and vibes\u2014not a screen in sight!  \" \/><\/p>\n<div class=\"sqs-html-content\" data-sqsp-text-block-content=\"\">\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">As we wrapped up, our waiter, as if waiting for the meal to conclude before raising the subject, asked if we \u201chad seen <em>White Lotus<\/em>.\u201d Thomas and I exchanged a brief glance, telepathically negotiating whether we\u2019d try to play it cool or admit it was the only reason we drove 30 minutes out of our way. \u201cWe\u2019ve seen it!\u201d Thomas responded, as though we hadn\u2019t just been debating if the infamous Pineapple Suite was real over $37 of bacon and eggs. Fortunately, our restraint didn\u2019t deter him. He immediately began ticking off production trivia: Most outdoor scenes were filmed at the adult pool up those stairs to the left. There\u2019s no \u201cPineapple Suite\u201d (but you can stay in its real-life equivalent, the \u201cMaile Presidential Suite,\u201d for <a href=\"https:\/\/www.fourseasons.com\/maui\/accommodations\/?generalReservationForm.checkInDate=2025-05-25&amp;generalReservationForm.checkOutDate=2025-05-26&amp;generalReservationForm.guestCountPerRoom[0].adultCount=2&amp;generalReservationForm.guestCountPerRoom[0].childCount=0&amp;generalReservationForm.locationId=OGG516&amp;cawConfig.customBooker=true&amp;availCheckTemplate=fourseasons.com&amp;roomFindingMethod=eCAW\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">$31,000 per night<\/span><\/a>!). Jennifer Coolidge ate breakfast in that corner, sealed off from other guests. \u201cThere were real guests staying here while they filmed?\u201d Thomas asked. \u201cYeah,\u201d he replied, \u201cThey just blended right in.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\">The equations of the \u201cfinancial independence, retire early\u201d movement translate time to money: The accumulation of investments worth 25x your annual expenses in tax-advantaged, low-cost index funds is, supposedly, the most direct way to buy your freedom. Something tells me that locked tech bag might be cheaper.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This essay contains copious White Lotus season 3 spoilers. If you\u2019re not caught up, please stop whatever else you\u2019re doing and go spend the next eight hours in front of your TV, which is the only screen we\u2019re celebrating today. Timothy Ratliff is screwed. While on vacation at a fictional resort in Thailand called the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":2492,"template":"","meta":[],"categories":[30,52,18],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-357","essays","type-essays","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-culture","category-money-psychology","category-productivity-and-time"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v25.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Pineapple Suite State of Mind - Money with Katie<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/moneywithkatie.com\/essays\/pineapple-suite-state-of-mind\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Pineapple Suite State of Mind - Money with Katie\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This essay contains copious White Lotus season 3 spoilers. 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If you\u2019re not caught up, please stop whatever else you\u2019re doing and go spend the next eight hours in front of your TV, which is the only screen we\u2019re celebrating today. Timothy Ratliff is screwed. 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